Much like a toddler, your genitals need a home that’s safe, supportive, and (hopefully) sanitary. Whether you’re sitting through a mind-numbing Zoom meeting, climbing a mountain, or trying to flatter your junk on date night, choosing the right underwear is one of the most important decisions a man can make.

Thankfully, you have more options than the plastic-covered multi-packs at your local department store. But conducting a cost-benefit analysis of the various shapes, lengths, and fabrics can induce a sense of existential dread for many men.

Thankfully, we’ve done the hard work to help you choose the best home for your balls and dick. From basic boxers to frilly man-panties, here’s the scoop on seven types of men’s underwear.

1. Boxer Shorts

Boxers are like the Bud Light of men’s underwear: basic, cheap, and the stuff you buy as an impressionable adolescent. They’re basically thin, baggy shorts that extend halfway down your thigh and have an elastic waistband.

Fun fact: The first boxer shorts were made in 1925 by the founder of boxing outfitters Everlast.

The main selling point for boxers is the loosey-goosey fit. However, that can create more problems than it solves. All the extra leg room lets your nuts rumble around like a rodeo. Not to mention boxer shorts are notorious for riding up your legs, causing wedgies.

Ideal For: Guys who want to air out their junk and don’t mind their family jewels flopping around

2. Boxer Briefs

Boxers briefs give you the same coverage as OG boxers with a snug fit that caresses your nether regions. Think of them like a really comfortable seatbelt for your twig and berries. The streamlined fit of boxer briefs makes them virtually wedgie-proof, plus they won’t show through your pants or shorts.

The best boxer briefs have a fly so you (or your partner) can get easy access to your wang. Of all the types of men’s underwear, supportive underwear like boxer briefs give you the best balance of comfort, support, aesthetics, and versatility.

If you really want to pamper your privates, slip into a pair of Culprit Boxer Briefs. They’re made with ultra breathable, soft AF micromodal to keep you sweat-free from the couch to the club and everywhere in between. Not to mention we’ve got a shit ton of epic patterns that will keep your package lookin’ prime like Amazon.

Ideal For: Literally anything—working out, binge-watching football, chopping down firewood, etc.

3. Trunks

Trunk-cut underwear is basically the same as boxer briefs, except with shorter legs—usually about 3 inches. If you’ve been hitting leg day consistently and want to show off those tree trunk thighs, trunks are your best bet.

Trunks are also a great option if you’re wearing shorts, since they won’t poke out from underneath. Just make sure you go with micromodal fabric to stay dry down below.

Ideal For: Showing off those power thighs you’ve been sculpting

4. Long Briefs

Much like your group chat with the boys, long briefs give you lots of support. You get the same snug fit as regular boxer briefs, with a longer inseam that extends down to your lower thigh. 

If you’re rocking jeans or dress pants, this extra-long inseam will protect you from thigh chafing so you can walk, run, moonwalk, and bust moves in max comfort.

Ideal For: Fellas who want a little extra insurance against thigh chafing

5. Briefs, Jockeys, and Tighty Whities

This is the type of underwear your dad and grandpa wore back when they could buy a house and car on a measly salary. They go by many names—briefs, jockeys, tighty whities. Either way, these are tighter and shorter than boxers, cutting off where your leg and hip meet. 

Sure, briefs show off your thighs and flatter your pecker. But the lack of airflow creates the perfect storm for jock itch, swamp ass, and chafing. Not to mention they smother your nuts to the point that they can lower your sperm count.

Ideal For: The elderly or anybody who wants to kill their sperm count

6. Thongs

We tracked down a 2017 study which found that only 1% of American dudes wore thongs on a weekly basis, and not a single guy wore one daily. However, if you find yourself tempted to rock out with your cock (almost) out, there are a few caveats to consider…

The main issue is that your bare ass will be exposed to whatever pants you’re wearing, thereby increasing the risk of butt chafing and sweat stains. Most man thongs leave a little room for your dick and balls, but it’s still going to be more cramped than an airplane lavatory down there.

You do you—we’re not here to kink shame. But don’t blame us if you wind up with chafed balls and butt at the end of the day.

Ideal For: Feeling sexy AF but still hiding your hog

7. Long Johns

Long johns (AKA thermal underwear) are designed to insulate your legs when the temps dip down. They’re usually made from snug, stretchy fabrics like cotton or polyester and cover your whole leg, from ass to ankle.

Long johns aren’t exactly practical for everyday use, unless you chop lumber in Alaska for a living. But you might want to have a pair if you plan on going skiing, snowboarding, or hiking—otherwise your twig and berries might freeze.

Keep Your Cannoli Comfy AF

Your dick and balls are arguably the two most sensitive things on your body. Do you really want to encase them with stiff, scratchy cotton—even if it means saving a few bucks? 

If the answer is yes, you’re an absolute psychopath who needs help immediately. But if you’re a sane, rational person, you’ll spend your hard-earned money on Culprit Boxers because they f*cking rule. 

If these aren’t the most comfortable men’s underwear you’ve ever worn, we’ll give you your money back.